Calming storms within us
To all my readers, again I apologize for being absent. I left you hanging when I was struggling last week - still struggling but for many reasons. I am not as depressed about being a diabetic as I was and I am not quitting. It was a storm for a short time period and I know it is a storm that will come again.
FBS - 121 this morning. Not bad after I had a lot of home made toffee last night during the movie. That is truly my down fall. I just love toffee and it is nothing but sugar. I am going to have to find a low-carb toffee recipe for the upcoming years - NOT!!!!
As you know, it is Sunday and this is the day I want to keep our Higher Powers in our minds and working for us. I am a Christian and practicing Catholic as I have said before. I think I am blessed as I have two Higher Powers, God and Jesus. To me they are one in the same; but represent different strength in my life.
I think it important that your Higher Power play the same role for you that mine does for me when it comes to calming life's major or minor storms. This topic is fitting today for two reasons, right now my life is filled with many storms and last night we were out as a family and got caught in the storms that went through the area.
The evening just made me realize diabetes is like a storm and we have to constantly have mechanisms or methods to help us deal with the storms of diabetes. We have to test to make sure we are monitoring the "storm" patterns. We have to manage our food intake so we do not create any major storms.
So let me explain how my Higher Power(s) calm my storms.
Jesus Calms The Storm
Matthew 8:28 - 34 from the New International Version bible.23 Then he got into the boat and his disciples followed him. 24 Suddenly a furious storm came up on the lake, so that the waves swept over the boat. But Jesus was sleeping. 25 The disciples went and woke him, saying, “Lord, save us! We’re going to drown!”
26 He replied, “You of little faith, why are you so afraid?” Then he got up and rebuked the winds and the waves, and it was completely calm.
27 The men were amazed and asked, “What kind of man is this? Even the winds and the waves obey him!”
This verse in the bible has always been a player in my life. Yes, Jesus calmed the storm and weather was the storm. But to me, like so many things in life, the storm was symbolic of life's storms and how my Higher Power can calm those storms that are much easier to control than the weather.
We know that stress drives up our glucose levels. So let's examine my life and how daily events can cause stress and how I use my Higher Power (God and Jesus) to help calm the storms.
Work Related Storms
I have a career that can cause a lot of stress from deadlines. failed computer outages, or people just wanting to get something done quicker than they should. I also have my own business so on top of the normal storms that occur within the technology field, I compound mine by adding the stress of finding new contracts or work.
At the moment, I am on a contract and the pressure is on to deliver ahead of schedule because the company is out of money; but, the project needs to get done. So we are all under a lot of stress to make it happen.
In addition, I am running into a stream of good luck and I have created 3 proposals for potentially new business just this past two weeks.
In the past I would have worked all night doing both and would have put myself through a lot of stress. I would not have eaten right, I would not have gone to the gym, and I would not have gotten much sleep. All of these things lead to my diabetes onslaught and my levels continually rising.
Today, I now go to church twice on Sundays and listen the word of God and give myself a 3 hour break from all of the noise. In the past I would go to church - maybe - and I would be thinking about work. I would tune out the sermon and the time time I could relax and find comfort from life's storms. I did not realize I was removing the one thing in my life that could help the rest of the week be better.
I also used to worry about deadlines and I would work all hours of the day to make it happen. Now I realize, that is not that important and giving 8-10 hours a day is enough time for work. Yes, I still put in extra hours and do more than my fair share - but I do limit it and when possible - I take some quiet time.
So use your Higher Power to grant yourself some personal time and time to pay attention to your Higher Power and to yourself. Your diabetes will appreciate the quiet time.
Relationship Storms
Relationships are important to all of us - they make us feel like we belong, like we are loved, and like we have value. If you are lacking in relationships, then I would encourage you to get one with your Higher Power - it will really help.
But here I am talking about how these relationships can cause stress and storms in our life. I love my wife and I am positive after 38+ years she loves me. But we do have our moments - maybe more than we both like, when we are in love but not loving each other. We have things that get in the way.
During those times, I feel rotten, I feel alone, I feel anger, I feel frustration, and just about every other feeling you can imagine comes out. I do not eat right and I do not think about taking care of myself. I just do not care! I never used to know how to move on from these situations - none of us come with owner manuals to explain these things.
These are the times I "lean" into my Higher Power the most. I ask God to calm my heart, take away my frustration, and get me off my dead butt and go apologize - even if I do not feel I did something wrong - just go engage and get the conversation stared.
Do not let these kind of storms run for a long time - this is the tornado, hurricane, or typhoon in your life. It is you cancer that eats at your heart and destroys the very thing that makes us humans.
I have two lovely children, Sarah and Brian. I have not always been a good Dad and there are times I was wrong in my punishment or anger. They are over 30 now and I still think there are times I am supposed to be their Dad and tell them what to do. This puts strain on our relationship.
Then I remember my Dad and how I hated when he would tell me what to do. Then I smarten up and back off and know they must run their own lives. Then I look to be their Father not their Dad, if you get my drift on that one.
My God is like that, he is my Father in Heaven and the beauty is, he does not tell me what to do. He laid out some simple rules to live by that are nothing more than being a good human being. Then he sits on the side and pours out his love and waits for me to come to him. If only us earthly Fathers could be like that.
So let your Higher Power show you how to manage your relationships and calm those storms in your life. Do not let these storms rage without calling on your Higher Power to be the source of love and a support team.
The Diabetes Storm
Ah yes, the beast that lives in all of us. The "perfect storm." The one that can make our live miserable, can cause us to go blind, can cause us to lose body parts, and can cause us to have all kinds of other diseases. The "beast" that drives our lives to the brink of quitting. The "monster" that haunts us in our sleep and lives below our skin in places we cannot see.
Our Higher Powers are truly needed to help us fight this horrible storm. I use God to talk to, to help me when I am weak, and to listen to my pain. I "USE" him and I think he is okay with that. I use him to remind me when I should not eat something. I use him to let me know it is better to go work out than do something else.
I use him as my most effective medicine to fight this disease with all his power and might. For without him, I think I would lose the battle.
All I can say is use you Higher Power to give you strength to eat right. Use your Higher Power to remind you to test, test, test. Know what is going on inside you at all times. Never ever go without knowing what the monster inside you is doing.
Use you Higher Power to lift you up when you are down - no one else might be around. My God wants to lift me up and care for me. As I have said before, I feel lucky, I have learned to face my disease with my family and my God. When I let it alone inside where no one could see it, I failed. When I brought it out in the open and faced it, I started winning. I have a long ways to go but I believe I have the support from God to get there or fight the good fight.
The Calmness of Love
I mentioned as a Christian I get two Higher Powers. I have Jesus, Son of God, who came to earth to bring a new message for all of us - the message of Love. Love thy God, Love thy neighbor, and Love they enemy. His message was simple and to show me how simple and easy was his message, he stretched out his arms on a cross and gave his life because he Loved me. It is as simple as that.
So his Love, can calm my storms as easy as he looked to the skies and asked the raging storm to leave and it left.
He is the greatest Higher Power as he was with us today.
'Lean" into your Higher Power to calm your storms. Your Higher Power wants you to feel calm and wants to help you manage your disease. "Lean" into your Higher Power and find strength that only Higher Powers can bring.
IN CASE I DO NOT HAVE TIME TO WRITE ANOTHER POST - MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL AND MAY THIS BE THE SEASON THAT HIS COMING LIGHTS UP YOUR LIFE AND WAYS YOU COULD NEVER HAVE IMAGINED.
Bob,
Your most poignant post yet Bob! I don't know if you saw the post by changedforlive, but he has used his higher power and made a real accomplishment this week. He took a picture of his bg meter that had a reading of 99!!!!! He gave thanks to God for getting him on the right road....I truly believe God lead him to the forums when he thought he had received a death sentence with his diagnosis.
ReplyDeleteI was very glad to hear that you are not giving up on your care. Having something you love once a year will not lessen your control overall.
Turmoil can hit in our lives at any time. That is when you seek the guidance of God, it helps calm the storm....most things that happen are really small in the overall scheme of life.
I baked all afternoon in preparation for our family celebration. I am tired, but so pleased with the outcome of some new low-carb recipes. We will be spending the morning with my mother and our special friends on Christmas day. Then off to my brother's home for our family gathering. My mother is missed greatly at this gathering of her children, grandchildren, greats and great greats....LOL
Please add my 76 year old brother-in-law to your prayer list....I think I mentioned to you that he fell off a ladder and broke his foot and hand. He now has pneumonia to go along with the other problems. He is very much a brother to me as I was 2 years old when they married 56 years ago. Their church has stepped in to help and someone comes over to stay with him to give my sister time for shopping and she did go to see my mother on Monday. That is worrying her that she cannot visit my mom as she usually does. I told her to take care of her husband, I will take care of our mother....
A very Merry Christmas to you and yours Bob! Enjoy your family and friends, relax and put diabetes away for a day.
A friend who cares
Marty